Foolproof, and foolish, ways to keep things clean all the time.

1. Ask your kids to kindly, not make a mess.

Kids are messy. If you want a cleaner home, simply ask your kids to keep things tidy.

Oh, it’s simple: just have a family meeting and politely request your little darlings to stop being human tornadoes of crumbs, crayons, and chaos. Surely, they’ll respond with nothing but compliance. Remind them, “Mommy didn’t sign up to be a full-time maid.” Bonus tip: Create a chore chart that they’ll completely ignore but looks great on the fridge!

2. Never entertain.

Just don’t. You’ll have to clean up after.

Hosting is so overrated. Why invite people over when all it does is increase your cleaning load? From scrubbing the guest bathroom to pretending your floors are spotless, entertaining is basically an unpaid second job. Suggest meeting at a park instead, where everyone can bond over fresh air and no one needs to clean up spilled wine.

3. Stop adopting pets.

Unless they’re cats. Cats are cleaner, or so we hear.

Dogs track mud, chew everything, and act like they’ve never seen a couch they didn’t want to destroy. Cats, on the other hand, sleep 23 hours a day and only occasionally push your coffee mug off the counter. They’re basically the minimalist’s dream pet. Better yet, consider a goldfish—low maintenance and zero shedding.

JUST KIDDING.

LIFE IS MESSY.

That's why, at Guests on Earth, it's our mission to make cleaning more enjoyable and sustainable for everyone, every day.

Our line of nontoxic, plant-based products smells incredible, feels amazing and works extremely well. Because if you're going to clean, you might as well enjoy it.